Listen: That hole is a regret-hole and it is not empty -- it's filled with a dipping sauce, and life-affirming objects only mar the natural zest of it's creamy base!
And you know what else? That dipping sauce in your regret hole -- it's made almost entirely of regret.
Now, let's be honest here: Don't you regret dipping into that regret sauce?
Well, no wonder! It tastes like crap!
Look: while your regret could be served at a dinner party, your family and friends would not be very pleased. But that's no problem because your primary concern is to live your life feeling guilty about things that are beyond your control -- not to try and fix it!
Don't you get it -- Your life sucks and there's nothing you can do about it and that's what you like about it!
That's where we come in! Did you see that look of disappointment on your father's face? How about your grandma crying? Well, turn those frowns upside down in minutes! Our Real Lime-Regret-Chest-Hole Zesty Dipping Sauce with Chives (TM) will suck your family into your chest and fill both you and them with something akin to fulfillment!*
*Note: you may notice your family flaking off in much the same way that dumplings leave bits of crust floating in your sternum.
And remember, don't just share your regret-hole -- regret sharing it too!
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